Funding required!

Funding required

for a fin floatie factory!

I want to outfit all ocean-habitants

with fin sized floaties.

I’ll bring every fin’d thing to the surface

(but not long they can’t breathe).

I’ll have hor d’oeuvres ready.

Does marine life like blue cheese?

I’ll study what’s inside the ocean

without having to get all wet.

To the contents of this salty pool

a fish president I’ll elect.

Then I’ll take my trusty safety pin

and pop each floatie one by one.

They’ll sink back to oceanic-blivion.

What a learned day of fun!


The Reason for Ear Wax (funny poem)

Ear wax was invented

by the brain – that clever chap!

As a barrier to absorbing

other people’s verbal crap.


My Recorder (funny poem)

What’s wrong with my recorder?
No matter what I play
their words say “oh how lovely!”
But their expressions: “go away.”


It started so well (funny poem)

God bless the man
who makes my ice cream.
God bless logistics
(chocolate from bean!)

God bless my brother
who is so fun to hit
God bless my allowance
(real and counterfeit)

God bless Gran’s amnesia
(two birthdays a year!)
God bless the bad guy
(my future career)


Humpty Dumpty: the final verse (funny poem)

So they souffled his whites
and scrambled his yolk.
Humpty was served piping hot
with a side of artichoke.



Middle Age (funny poem)

Middle age is a perplexity.
Only God knows the number.
It might be 40, maybe 65
til I’m half way to six feet under


Evil brewing, stewing (funny poem)

There’s a chance I may be evil
(I’m testing the theory.)
The laugh in my head is now deep dark and baritone
instead of light and cheery.